Avril Lavigne and Chris Rene perform "Complicated" on "The X Factor." |
has officially inked a deal to be an "X Factor" judge. So the bad news is...this show going to be a trainwreck. And the good news is...THIS SHOW IS GOING TO BE A TRAINWRECK!
Let's face it, this development could be awesome. Every
reality fan loves a good trainwreck, of course, and the possibilities
here for utterly ridiculous television are almost endless. Rubberneckers
will undoubtedly tune in to "The X Factor" just to check out what goes
down, and I admit I will be among them, popcorn at hand. We all have to
remember that the original British version of "The X Factor" really
amped up the camp (Jedward singing "Ghostbusters" with proton packs on their backs being but one example of this),
but Jedward's antics might look positively tame compared to what
Britney could bring. (Even her short-lived "Chaotic" reality series with
her future ex-husband Kevin Federline was can't-look-away fascinating.)
So set your DVRs now, people.
But then again, for those of us who take our singing competitions seriously...this casting could be a disaster in a flat-out bad way.
Melanie Amaro and R. Kelly perform "I Believe I Can Fly" on "The X Factor." |
But let's put Britney's lack of multi-octave vocal range aside. After
all, Britney's other predecessor, Paula Abdul, was hardly a powerhouse
singer, but that never seemed to hinder her ability to mentor or judge.
Perhaps the more crucial issue here is whether or not Britney will be
able to deal with being on live national television. According to The Hollywood Reporter,
"X Factor" insiders have been "genuinely concerned as to whether Spears
will be able to competently handle having to give an opinion in a live
setting"--and you know, they should be concerned. I actually
suspect that Britney's televised incompetence could make Nicole
Scherzinger's flighty indecisiveness on Rachel Crow's notorious elimination night look like nothing.
"Overprotected" singer Britney--who has been living under the
conservatorship of her father, Jamie Spears, since her mental breakdown
of 2008--is hardly accustomed to working without a net. Just last year,
Carson Daly (ironically, now the host of "The Voice") openly complained
about strict restrictions placed on a radio interview he'd attempted to
set up with the pop star--restrictions presumably requested by her
management to prevent her from having to adlib on the air, or to prevent
her from saying something she shouldn't, like she did during her infamous 2006 Matt Lauer interview
(one of the last candid interviews she ever gave, before electing to
conduct most of her interviews via email).
Josh Krajcik and Alanis Morissette perform "Uninvited" on "The X Factor." |
Melanie Amaro performs "Someone Like You" by Adele |
Carson claimed that Britney's
management not only demanded that their conversation be pretaped, but
that the interview be submitted for approval and edited by Britney's own team before it could air. Now, considering that Britney's handlers were that worried about her appearing on a live radio
show without special treatment, how can anyone expect her to think on
her feet on live TELEVISION? How can she be trusted to make a quick
decision on elimination nights, keep up with Simon and L.A. Reid's
barbs, or critique a contestant without reading off a script? (Which
begs another important question: Can she read a script?) It seems like a recipe for disaster to me. It's no wonder that, according to The Hollywood Reporter, Britney has been undergoing "extensive media training" to prepare for this demanding new job.
Melanie Amaro performs "Hero" by Mariah Carey |
It must be noted that Simon has already risked so much with this
troubled show, which is why it surprises me that he'd be so willing to
take a gamble on Britney. To launch "The X Factor USA" last year, he
walked away from a $36 million "American Idol" paycheck (and a rumored
"Idol" counter-offer of $100 million); temporarily vacated his judging
posts on "Britain's Got Talent" and "The X Factor U.K"; had Sony pony up
a $5 million record contract, the biggest cash prize in reality
competition history; and foolishly bragged that "The X Factor" would
trounce "Idol" in the ratings and regularly draw in 20 million viewers.
And then, when that didn't happen, he made drastic changes to the show
after just one season, firing not only Nicole and Paula but also host Steve Jones.
So there's a lot riding
on Season 2--and, specifically, on Britney Spears. Is this one "X
Factor" gamble that will pay off? I'm not so sure--I think Simon may be
paying way too high a price for a short-term buzz, since even trainwreck-loving viewers won't continue to
tune in if his much-hyped new judge can't properly do her job at least
part of the time. But I suppose we will find out when "The X Factor"
returns to Fox this fall if hiring Britney was a shrewd move, or if
Simon will be regretfully saying, "Oops, I did it again."
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